Season One : Episode 9 "Adventures and Faith"

Life has been grand. I really have had a wonderful week. It has been filled with hard work and spending time with those whom I love, my family. The other weekend I had the opportunity to travel up to Utah for my friends wedding and my mission President's homecoming. It was wonderful to see old friends and to spend time with Em. While up there I had memories flood my mind from my mission from the great work I was a part of and the many blessings I received. Certainly it was a wonderful time to say the least.

It had been perfect timing to travel because it was my birthday that weekend! It turned out to be my best birthday yet. I got to introduce Em to my mom, which was fun! It was cool to see how well they got along! I could tell it was only going to get better from there. Em and I attended my friend Ryan Smith's Wedding. It was wonderful to see him and Mrs. Smith so happy and I was glad to be there to support them!

We went back to Em's apartment after to change for our trip to SLC. She had made me a Butterfinger & Reese's gluten free birthday cake! I was so surprised and it was absolutely delicious : ) She had got me some V-necks which looked pretty cool, "hey she will be able to keep me in style",  a pack of gum "I knew then she loved me, because she hated it when I chewed gum haha", and a framed picture collage of us "which I loved & still love, it was probably my favorite!" It is incredible how fast life goes by, it seems that it never really slows down.

When I was discovering what to blog a conversation I recently had with a friend came to mind. We were talking about God and my friend expressed that in a time when they were doing all that was right they experienced the greatest trial of their life and saw their world crash around them without any of it being within their control or their fault. My friend told me that this was when they lost their faith in God. I was saddened to hear this, to hear of their pain and of their struggles, of difficulties and challenges no one should ever face, yet sadly so many today do.

Life can be hard. There are so many serious trials that are out there, whether it be that of illness,depression, losing a loved one, infidelity in a marriage, addictions or so many other possibilities. When these trials come upon us we are lead to ask in our hearts why? For so many the question then becomes why it is happening to them? We evaluate our lives and while we know God loves us, it is hard because it doesn't feel like love...

It is so hard to be strong when we are put in these circumstances. It is hard to believe that which is not easily found or seen. There are so many deceptions the adversary will tell us. Rarely will he appear to you visibly seen and audibly heard. He works in the shadows and in the dark. He will put lies in our mind and deceptive words. Instead he will cause us to question if God is aware of us. He will cause us to ask ourself if God has heard us. He will convince us simply that God does not care and so he is not there. But I guess my purpose is not to speak of this... the lies and thoughts of Satan. Instead it was to share that God is there. He is always there. That he watches over each of us, every second, of every hour, of every day. That he knows of our pain and of our struggle.

Many assume that my life is perfect or that I am a perfect Mormon. The truth is that I have problems just like everyone else. The truth is I have trials like everyone else. I have felt the lowest of lows. I have wondered how I got to where I was and struggled to see the light in the darkness. But I have also learned that even the deepest darkness is pierced by the smallest light. For where there is light, darkness cannot reside.

If we allow ourselves to hope it will always be able to overcome despair and with hope comes faith and with faith comes charity and with charity come the pure love of Christ. As we serve those around us we begin to see that our trials our problems and our difficulties are not so bad. We look to others instead of ourselves. When negative thoughts come to mind we must replace them with thoughts of faith and hope. For truely God is always there and will turn the most difficult of times we face into a blessing and learning experience that we may grow. Not every trial is given by God. In fact many trials we face are the result of the actions of others. Our Heavenly Father has created a divine plan with agency, the freedom to choose. We must choose what we will do. Despite the choices of others. Though they will be judged of God for their actions, they are never an excuse for own decisions.

I remember a time shortly after returning home from my mission when I was in despair, this time had been brought to mind after reading the following revelation given to the prophet Joseph Smith, recorded in Doctrine & Covenants 122:6-7

6 If thou art accused with all manner of false accusations; if thine enemies fall upon thee; if they tear thee from the society of thy father and mother and brethren and sisters; and if with a drawn sword thine enemies tear thee from the bosom of thy wife, and of thine offspring, and thine elder son, although but six years of age, shall cling to thy garments, and shall say, My father, my father, why can’t you stay with us? O, my father, what are the men going to do with you? and if then he shall be thrust from thee by the sword, and thou be dragged to prison, and thine enemies prowl around thee like wolves for the blood of the lamb;

7 And if thou shouldst be cast into the pit, or into the hands of murderers, and the sentence of death passed upon thee; if thou be cast into the deep; if the billowing surge conspire against thee; if fierce winds become thine enemy; if the heavens gather blackness, and all the elements combine to hedge up the way; and above all, if the very jaws of hell shall gape open the mouth wide after thee, know thou, my son, that all these things shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good.

As I read this scripture I realize whatever my trials, they are small when compared to many of these struggles. Though it may feel "the very jaws of hell shall gape open the mouth wide after thee, know thou, my son, that all these things shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good." We can know in the most difficult of trials that God is there and very aware of us. If we will only allow him in our lives he will be there to help us, to comfort us, and to lift us. I testify that the Lord Christ lives. That He atoned for all sins. That He felt all our pain. That He will help us no matter the trial. For I have faced and I have overcame through Christ Jesus.

In church a sister bought up the words of a song which to this day has always touched my heart,

'Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops

What if Your healing comes through tears 

What if a thousand sleepless nights 

Are what it takes to know You're near 

What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise 

          
There is so much we do not understand and do not know or at least there is so much I don't know and need to learn. I guess that is what life is for though, to grow. I guess if we didn't have the trials perhaps we wouldn't realize our blessings, perhaps we would never really learn. I guess I will close this post with the most thought provoking scripture I have read for when I am about to lose hope, faith, or just feel like giving up trying, it is Doctrine and Covenants 122:8

8 The Son of Man hath descended below them all. Art thou greater than he?

-Trent D. Nielson
“Keep the Faith & Never Give Up, Never Surrender!”